As you all know, our Precious Leader is fond of going "off script". At times the rest of the band (and the roadies and toadies, management and minions, sycophants and defendants) have to be nimble enough to change their opinions at less than a moment's notice. Break that Moral Compass. Those who can't keep up will be left behind.
What this means is that in these Dark Times it is even more important that we stick together. We must back up whatever our Precious Leader says. This may mean using sharpie to alter documents. Do not make that sour face while listening to him make up "facts" on the spot. We have to defend his "facts" or spin them to mean something other than what he actually meant or said. We may need to subtly and gently encourage him to say that he didn't say what he said or that he was being sarcastic.
This is made easier by rehearsing the following statements:
"Any rational person knows that he was just being sarcastic."
"He never said..." (This works whether there is video or audio evidence or not)
"You are taking that out of context"
and the ever popular,
"Fake News" (Again, works whether there is video or audio evidence or not)
We all know that those around our Precious Leader must all swear fealty to him. They are ready to deflect any accusations sent his way. They will diffuse a potentially Very Bad Situation by simultaneously promoting other competing stories. This practice of diffusing every Faux Pas by obfuscation is the most reliable strategy we have. The best example of this is to look at how magicians use misdirection to perform their feats of prestidigitation. When you are presented with something that our Precious Leader has said or done that is causing problems simply ignore it ("Don't look at the hat with the rabbit in it") and shout about anything else ("Oh My God! LOOK AT THAT GORILLA ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE STAGE!). Then while everyone is looking for the gorilla that was never there, quietly slip the rabbit into its hiding place, behind a wall of FOX news stories.
Remember, all of us are responsible for keeping our Precious Leader in power AT ANY COST!
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